Seeing Christ

As I walked out on the beach yesterday I saw Christ- flesh and bone- sitting, running, playing in the waves. He was screaming, “Sara! Sara!” With His big brown eyes and running up to give me a hug. He was saying, “Oh, please PLEASE teach me how to swim!” He then proceeded to lose His attention and ran to sit on the ocean letting the water wash over His legs and take His little body every which direction. He was sitting in the shade enjoying the few free peaceful moments away from the 7 beautiful little girls that. He cares for everyday.

As I walked away from the beach, again, there He was. He was bored and tranquil on a Sunday afternoon saying, “Sara! Take us to the park” “NO! Take us to the beach!” “No! Let’s make bracelets!” Jesus (All 6 beautiful faces of His) decided He wanted to make bracelets. As we walked to get the supplies, He pulled and tugged on my clothes trying to gain my full attention- which is hard to do when He is 6 different people. Jesus sat patiently (for a moment or two) as I tried to explain how to make a bracelet. He very quickly became restless and decided to try it His own way. The beads spilled everywhere and I helped Him pick them up. Sometimes, Jesus has learning disabilities and can’t always understand thing like how to make a bracelet, so He sits happily, watching His friends make them instead. Every time someone acknowledges Him when He is like this, He responds with a giant grin that could light up the whole world. When Jesus finishes making His bracelet, He is very proud of His work and says, “Sara! Sara! LOOK!” He likes to scream it in my ear with a big smile on His face.

I saw Him again in a different form. I was very nervous, as it was my first day shadowing for my new job as middle school Math teacher. Jesus was sitting in class, looking quite intimidating, waiting to form an opinion about His new teacher. He got incredibly angry when the teacher called Him out for talking. He didn’t really want to do any work and was often heard saying, “Teacher! I don’t WANT to!” Many times He wouldn’t say anything and would just stare with blank eyes at the teacher. Jesus was difficult and frustrating. I found Him much harder to love in this form… but in the end my love meant more, because it caused me to actively love.
“I have found the paradox that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love”

Update

The last 3 weeks of my life have been, to say the least, hectic. After traveling from Antigua, Guatemala to Honduras we arrived in La Ceiba where our Phase 2 is currently located. After the children finish their education here (up to 9^th grade) They have the opportunity to move on to phase two to continue their education in high school, and eventually college (phase three). Phase two permits them to have more freedom, responsibilities, and life experience in general.

After a couple days in Ceiba we made our way to the Finca in Trujillo where we have had orientation for the last 2 weeks. We have had time to meet all the children, became acquainted with this lace and its rules, its spirituality, and the other volunteers that keep it together. We had the opportunity to shadow different jobs, and were informed on Friday what our official title would be for at least the next year.

I came here thinking that I would be the social worker for the small children, (having experience in both sociology and working with children) but through discernment realized that I was being called very much so out of my comfort zone, as were many of the people in my group. Instead of hanging out with small children, I will be the colegio (7^th, 8^th, and 9^th grade) Math teacher. This is equivalent to the same grade in the U.S.- geometry, algebra, and whatnot. The only difference is that I will be teaching these subjects in Spanish, and the children tend to be high school age (14-18). Needless to say God is working in some mysterious was, but I’m so excited and ready to be in this position with all the blessing and difficulties. I will also be teaching computers to all grades (1^st-9^th). It’s amazing to look back even just a month ago and realize how much has changed within and around me that I would feel called to teach Math in a language that I barely know.